Boys will be boys

Sunny days sweepin the clouds away....

Sweetness of uncle & nephew

Not so sweetness

Can't forget Teddy!

No hands!



Weeeee

Saskia, please turn your head sideways......

Midnight snack

16 degrees; more snow expected this week

Taken this morning

Noodle Zen moment

DJack & Mum

loving Michigan....
a-woka-woka-woka

Shopping the guy way....

I don't believe in global warming anymore....

taken today

The novelty of snow is gone...
How's the weather where you live?

Fun with Beans

Dear Auntie Angela

We love all the great clothes & shoes you sent for Dakota!
Jumpin' & Skippin' in his new sneakers is the best.

He is particularly fond of this number...

on the same subject

Alright, so I've been a bit too busy to finish my little thing on our trip last month! Here is my final post from Pirates cove. We had a great time in the sun etc.... best of all were all the peops we had there with us. We had our awesome friends Steve & Kelly H. and their three kids. My Uncle Doug & Angela with their 5 kids, nanny and a couple couples with one more baby, Two of Keith's cousins; the Terrills with their 3 and 2 kids, My best girl Sasha and um.... oh yes, Keith's Uncle Craig stopped by for a night too. phew, what a group. Even with all that we managed to have some beautiful quiet time alone and lots of good fresh air. Oh, and did I mention there was a soft serve machine right by the upper pool? The temptation to pull a Homer Simpson was just too great for some husbands....

I wish I had taken more pictures of all the family and friends of course.
You can tell I've been too busy having fun when there are fewer pix to show
Okay Im done now.

videos

Sorry if you are sick of my little videos cause here come a bunch more.....
They are mostly for the benefit of grandparents etc....


first we have a couple moments with baby in the gym
The diver is my Uncle Doug. Garrett is in the background behind him.
The pools there were unbelievably cool with a waterslide n all!
We also spent some time in the racketball court. It was a great place to let all the boys loose.
At the end is dakota going over the suspension bridge all by himself! at first he was scared of it (as he should be) but then to his mother's terror he suddenly couldnt get enough of it and all forms of dangerous escapades.

Do you remember these guys?

These are the old pirates (and the dog) from the old Disney ride.


not bad to have such an up-close view...

Walking the Pirate Cavern

Pirates Cove

We just returned from a fabulous trip to a very special place called Pirate's Cove.
We swam everyday, hiked with beautiful views, worked-out every day, read pleasure books, jumped from high distances, let babies nap, ate heartily, were surrounded by tons of family & friends and had an unlimited supply of soft serve ice cream at our poolside.
It was one of the coolest vacations we've had in a long time and much needed.
Nothing beats a bit of sun & fun, especially in February.

I will try to post more pictures later when I have time.
For now, I'm still feeling dizzy from a great trip.

Uncle Ricky is here!!!!!

He has been helping tremendously with babysitting and dish washing since he arrived from Greece last Monday, and now we are leaving him for a week to relax.
He needs it after all we put him through so far!
Thanks Saskia for loaning him to us.....

S.A.D.

Sunlight & Action Deprivation
(or Desperation)
Who would of thought we would end up in a gloomier place than Portland?

In the last two weeks Grand Rapids has seen a total of 3 hours of sunlight.
There is a mountain of ice & snow outside and the temperature is -21F
(yes that is a minus before the number)

You know what's funny?
My brother just left the Mediterranean for Michigan!
He's moving in with us for a while and I'm so very excited to have him here
but is he in for an unpleasant surprise!

Always look on the bright side of life

Our trip to Utah had two faces.
On the one side was the obvious frowny grimace. The purpose to make a statement at my grandmother's murderer's trial. I hadn't really thought too hard on it, being so busy with the details of life, until it was time to walk in and do it. I was surprised by the intense spirit in that courtroom. I was also surprised by how overwhelmed with emotion I became. It was a heavy place and a rare aura of seriousness came over me. As I quietly sat down in my corner of the wooden bench, nuzzling into my cousin Phyllis' arms, I caught a glimps of him. Sharp nausea bite my insides and as I saw him turn his eyes to me I quickly hid behind some woman's head.
When it was my turn I stood and swore an oath of truth. There was an eery hush as I settled myself into the witness stand. I never saw him when I was up there. I didn't make an effort to either look his way or to avoid him. I was simply focused on the attorney in front of me and my grandmother, who I imagined standing near me. Looking back (though it makes no difference now as the sentencing is complete) I wished that maybe I had looked up into the faces of the jury. Just for curiosity. Instead I stayed safe in a small bubble of focus to get the job done.
There was however a moment from that experience that does cheer me up.
They asked me some questions, I read a short blurb, and toward the end of my statement I saw a nervous rustling in the corner of my eye. Then a man on the other side of the room shot up and blurted "I object". A few words were muttered each way and I was told to continue.
Wow, just like from Matlock. (no I dont really watch that show)

So, that was that. It is all over - for now anyway.

On the happy smiley side of the trip there are quite a few nice things.
1. They sent Keith a subpoena too so he could get out of work and come with me!
2. Tickets/hotel/lunch at ruby river each day was free! (tickets cost them $1500 bucks!)
3. I spent a day with one of my dearest friends Emily Potter Yahoooo
4. We also spent a day with Grandpa Neaman & June the lovely who shared with us so many wonderful stories - and He let us borrow his van....
5. We saw our cool cousin Traci and the terill kids who are all so cute and sweet and totally awesome
6. We stayed at Aunt Sandi's home for two nights which was such a fabulous treat! She had a crib (the hotel's was filthy and broken) and such a comfortable room for us.
7. We had a big family dinner at Aunt Kathy's home and a fun time catching up :)
8. We also had a fun family dinner at Aunt Sandi's home. Both were so delish!
9. We saw our old friend Brandon & Keith's old home
10. We had a short but really nice visit with my cousin Phyllis and breakfast at the airport together.
11. Dakota wasn't as horrifyingly miserable on the way back as he was on the way there.
12. It was sunny and pleasant
13. It was the first time that Utah looked beautiful to me - no, really really beautiful!
14. oh, and I rediscovered an old pair of diesel pants that I wore everyday there.
15. oh, oh, And I still swear that I saw Chuck Norris in the courtroom sitting in bench in front of me (though they insisted he was some reporter - I know what I saw...)

The few negatives that are big enough to mention are
1. President Gordon B Hinckely passed away
2. I found out from the tv in the lobby as I was checking in :(
3. Dakota was very sick on the way there and the first day.
4. We missed a lot of people we wanted to see because there wasn't enough time
5. Traveling with a baby/todd is just no fun.
6. I didn't take hardly any pictures!!!!

But look - There are more smilies than frownies!
That's the measure of a good life :)

Der Stammhalter

Good times with Great-Grandpa Neaman

update later
sleep now

Here's a little bouncy fun for ya

Smile

Access DENIED

If you are reading this now it should be because you have been specifically invited. That's right, no more open pages for the world to see. No more sending my thoughts into the universe like a bottle cast into the sea. I feel like my blog has been reasonably benign with simplistic updates. I haven't tried to get too deep or overly personal anyway right? If you are wondering why I have restricted access, it is because when you google my name (more importantly my husband's name) you easily get right here. That would be fine normally but my husband works for a hospital that thinks it's the CIA. Someone got wind that I posted his hours over-worked and projected a general unhappiness with Michigan and life as a resident's wife. Well, so. It's true I don't like it here. And he works more than the legal maximum by far. I won't lie about it just because they are trying to recruit new applicants. But I mustn't create unnecessary drama for Keith at work either. So I am officially, intentionally limiting my audience (if there are more than my usual commenters anyway). Thanks for stopping by...

Trial update

I did not go to this part of the trial because it was all too much at a bad time. They said I wasn't needed after all and could choose to come or not. I feel somewhat guilty for not attending (to show my devotion to my family) but also relieved. Traveling alone with a 1yr old is hard enough. Sitting in a courtroom staring down your grandmother's killer with that baby on your lap seems unbearable. I am still scheduled to go to the sentencing part in Feb however. Here is a link to the latest news video. The lady speaking at the end is my cousin Ellen (she lives in washington). You can see a quick glimps of me from 4 years ago showing the house. I cringe everytime I see his face and only force myself to read updates. My insides are turning in knots and it makes me feel sick
http://www.abc4.com/mediacenter/local.aspx?videoid=78052@video.ktvx.com
or click here

A day in the life...

Subpoena ?

I never realized that word was spelled
s-u-b-p-o-e-n-a
until it arrived in the mail and was looking at me.


After I received my mother's life insurance money I called my maternal grandmother and begged her to let me give her some. I figured her house was falling apart and insisted on buying an appliance or repair or something! I can't forget how she refused by saying
"Emily dear, let's make a deal; I'll take care of myself and you take care of yourself."
What shame I felt when I finally found myself knee deep in sorting through her old things and scrubbing her blood stained floor with the tears pouring from my eyes. A scene that echoed that of my mother's not long before.
Just before I heard the news of my grandma's brutal rape and murder I had talked with her again on the phone.
I cried to her about how much I missed my mother and proclaimed my guilt in hopes of changing the past. Her last message to me was this:
"You just need to live your life happy-go-lucky. Just live. Just be happy"
The next day it accured to me that I had very little knowledge of my mother or her mother's youth. There were no stories I could recall and few pictures I could find.
So I wrote her my final letter requesting anything her memory could devulge. I included the happiest go lucky picture of myself I had.
I found that picture by her bedside splattered with red. She never had time to reply.
Now I am called to attend the sentencing of a killer. One who killed more than just some old lady alone in her house. More than just a mother of two dead children. He is the creator of nightmares and horror. He is the destroyer of my last link to the past, of knowledge, and of motherly love.

my boys with Christmas toys